One paragraph, two styles
Below is the same notice twice. The content is identical; read both and notice what you have to work out yourself in the first version.
A notice about an application
Nominalstil
Nach Eingang Ihrer Unterlagen erfolgt die Prüfung durch unsere Fachabteilung.
Following receipt of your documents, they will be reviewed by our specialist department.
Bei Unvollständigkeit der Angaben ist eine Bearbeitung nicht möglich.
In the event of incomplete information, processing is not possible.
Die Auszahlung erfolgt nach Bewilligung innerhalb von zehn Werktagen.
Payment is made within ten working days of approval.
Verbalstil
Sobald Ihre Unterlagen bei uns eingegangen sind, prüft sie unsere Fachabteilung.
As soon as we have received your documents, our specialist department will review them.
Wenn Angaben fehlen, können wir Ihren Antrag nicht bearbeiten.
If any information is missing, we cannot process your application.
Wenn wir den Antrag bewilligt haben, zahlen wir das Geld innerhalb von zehn Werktagen aus.
Once we have approved the application, we will pay out the money within ten working days.
What each style does
Naming the effect
| Aspect | Nominalstil | Verbalstil |
|---|---|---|
| Length | Short, dense | Longer, easier to process |
| Who acts | Often unsaid | Named: wir, Sie |
| Time and logic | Hidden in a preposition: bei can mean when, if or while | Spelled out by the conjunction: sobald, wenn, weil |
| Tone | Impersonal, official, objective | Direct, personal, explanatory |
| Typical place | Official decisions, abstracts, headings, minutes | Customer letters, explanations, talks |
English plain-language guides push in one direction: use verbs. German professional writing is more tolerant of nouns, and a fully verbal official letter can sound chatty. The skill is to decide per text and per reader, not to prefer one style across the board.
Switching on purpose
- 1
Compress for overview
Headings, bullet points, abstracts and summaries gain from nouns: Senkung der Kosten um 12 Prozent.
- 2
Expand for understanding
When the reader has to act, or the logic matters, unpack into clauses: who does what, when, under which condition.
- 3
Mix within a paragraph
A good middle path: a verbal main clause carrying one noun phrase. Wir melden uns nach der Prüfung Ihrer Unterlagen.
Middle path
Wir melden uns nach der Prüfung Ihrer Unterlagen.
We'll get back to you after reviewing your documents.
Bei fehlenden Angaben können wir Ihren Antrag leider nicht bearbeiten.
If information is missing, we unfortunately cannot process your application.
